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They say you can wake up on the wrong side of the bed. But many days it feels like you woke up on the wrong side of calm. And who can blame you? Life seems to have gotten more complicated, stressful and chaotic, making it more difficult to feel peaceful and calm. But there are things […]
They say you can wake up on the wrong side of the bed. But many days it feels like you woke up on the wrong side of calm. And who can blame you? Life seems to have gotten more complicated, stressful and chaotic, making it more difficult to feel peaceful and calm.
But there are things you can do each day to get yourself on the right side of calm. Here are 3 of them:
1. Breathe Deeply
Many people are shallow breathers, meaning they take small, short breaths. But did you know shallow breathing is actually part of the “fight or flight” response? It’s an evolutionary adaptation designed to keep us safe from danger, like that angry sabretooth tiger chasing us. When faced with danger, our heartbeat speeds up and we breathe faster in order to get more oxygen for fighting or fleeing.
Our bodies don’t recognize real danger (that tiger) from modern day danger (that stack of bills). And so we spend most days breathing like our life depends on it.
One of the quickest ways to calm yourself is to slow down your breathing. Many people scoff at the idea that breathing deeply and slowly will do much of anything. Those that try it know deep breaths have an incredible calming affect.
2. Get Familiar with Your Acupressure Points
There are key acupressure points located on your hands, face, and head. These points are near bundles of nerves that, when massaged or tapped, can help relax your entire nervous system. This is why we instinctively rub our forehead and temples when we’re feeling stressed. You can subtly apply pressure to the meaty part of the hand between the thumb and forefinger when in a stressful meeting, at the airport, or any public setting when you need to calm down but don’t want to call much attention to yourself.
3. Focus on the Positive Things in Your Life
Every night before you fall asleep, think about three things that happened that day you are grateful for. They can be small, like that parking spot in front of the always-busy post office you got this morning, or big, like your son’s ankle was sprained not broken.
Feeling happy and grateful will naturally calm you down and give you a different perspective on things. And, doing this exercise night after night will train your brain to be more positive.
Have you tried these tips in the past but are still dealing with persistent anxiety and worry? Therapy can help you uncover the root cause of your anxiety and provide tools for coping.
If you or a loved one is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
We live in a society that seems obsessed with physical health and weight loss. A majority of people have tried one or more diets to lose weight. People join gyms, juice, and take supplements, all in an effort to optimize their physical health. Sadly, most people don’t give their mental health a second thought. The […]
We live in a society that seems obsessed with physical health and weight loss. A majority of people have tried one or more diets to lose weight. People join gyms, juice, and take supplements, all in an effort to optimize their physical health.
Sadly, most people don’t give their mental health a second thought.
The problem is, no matter how good you look in a bathing suit or how “ripped” you may be, or how low your cholesterol is if you aren’t mentally healthy, your life is negatively impacted.
In the age of Coronavirus, when many of us are dealing with health and financial struggles, the stress can really take a toll on our mental health. With this in mind, here are some good mental health habits to practice in 2021 and beyond:
Gratitude is like a magic bullet when it comes to mental health. Too often, when we are feeling negative emotions, we deny our full reality, that is to say, we deny all of the wonderful things that are present in our life. Be sure to take realistic stock in your life each day and feel grateful for the people, events, and things in your life that bring you joy and happiness. And be sure to share your gratitude with others!
The only thing worse than dealing with grief, sadness, and stress, is doing so while devaluing your own self-worth. Be sure to treat yourself as kindly as you do your loved ones. See the good in you and practice self-care and self-compassion every day.
Most of us cling to the idea that we can control every single facet of our lives. It’s just not true. This desire for full control brings with it a sense of anxiety. Make this year the year you finally let go of needing to control everything.
Toxic people are bad for our mental health. It’s time to cut ties with those who bring you down in order to make room for people who will support you.
Along with these habits, you may want to consider speaking regularly with a mental health counselor, who can help you navigate any issues you may be dealing with and provide coping techniques.
If you’d like to explore treatment options, please get in touch with me. Let’s discuss how I can help you make 2021 your best year yet!
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For many of us, college was absolutely the best time in our lives. The freedom and friendships made those four years incredibly special. But college isn’t all sparkles and unicorns. For others, college is a completely different and often negative experience. As fun as it can be, it’s also incredibly stressful, especially when it comes time to […]
For many of us, college was absolutely the best time in our lives. The freedom and friendships made those four years incredibly special. But college isn’t all sparkles and unicorns. For others, college is a completely different and often negative experience.
As fun as it can be, it’s also incredibly stressful, especially when it comes time to take an exam. The bigger and more important the exam is, the more we tend to suffer from anxiety, and the less likely we are to do our best.
If this scenario sounds all too familiar to you, then use the following tips and exercises to help lower your anxiety before the next big exam you take:
1. Breathe Deeply
When we feel fear, our body can go into an adrenaline-fueled panic mode. This chemical and physical reaction is how our ancestors survived numerous threats. But in this state, our minds do not function properly. In fact, they often go completely blank.
When we take slow, deep breaths, we help our bodies go from the survival response to a relaxed response. This helps the blood flow back into our brain and helps us focus on the task at hand.
2. Change Your Perspective
Most of us think of tests as something designed specifically to trick us. The truth is, if you have studied and are totally prepared, then the test is actually an opportunity for you to show off how much you know.
The other truth is your professors WANT you to pass. When you pass, they look good. So stop going into the exam with a negative attitude and go in feeling confident and knowing your teachers want you to do well.
3. Start Strong
To set the right tone for the test, scan it to find those questions you are 100% sure about and answer those first. This will help you feel confident and put your mind into a free-flow thinking state.
4. Be Realistic
What is your history of taking exams? Have you generally done well in the past? Are you a good student that makes an effort? If so, remind yourself of these facts. It’s easy to have dramatic and unrealistic ideas floating around in your head right before an exam. Thoughts like, “I’m gonna fail and then I won’t pass the class and I won’t get my degree and will end up working at Starbucks the rest of my life if I’m lucky.”
This likely won’t happen so don’t make an already stressful situation worse by being unrealistic.
5. Exercise
Exercise the morning before your exam. This will not only release built-up tension in your muscles (make sure to stretch after your workout), but it will also release “feel-good” endorphins that will put you in a better frame of mind.
If you would like some extra help handling the stressors of academic life, please reach out to me today to schedule an appointment.
Sources:
https://psychcentral.com/lib/9-ways-to-reduce-anxiety-right-here-right-now/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-practice/201502/test-anxiety-quick-tips
Hypnosis has to be one of the most misunderstood mental health treatments hands down. The myths surrounding this treatment stem from the many exaggerated movie scenes and stage shows that get people to cluck like a chicken. The truth is, hypnosis is an effective psychological treatment that has helped countless people. In a clinical setting, […]
Hypnosis has to be one of the most misunderstood mental health treatments hands down. The myths surrounding this treatment stem from the many exaggerated movie scenes and stage shows that get people to cluck like a chicken.
The truth is, hypnosis is an effective psychological treatment that has helped countless people. In a clinical setting, hypnosis simply puts people into a highly focused or relaxed state, where there is heightened suggestibility. In this relaxed state, positive suggestions seem to better find their way into the subconscious mind, where they can then help people make better choices in their lives.
Hypnotherapy is often used to treat anxiety, phobias, substance abuse including tobacco, sexual dysfunction, undesirable spontaneous behaviors, and bad habits. Hypnosis can also be used to help with insomnia and other sleep issues, learning disorders, relationship issues and problems with communication. It has even been used successfully to aid in pain management and has been able to help resolve certain medical conditions such as digestive disorders, skin issues and GI upset related to chemotherapy and pregnancy.
Due to the Coronavirus pandemic, many therapists have had to pivot and offer their clients therapy sessions via telehealth solutions. Now you may be wondering if hypnotherapy can really work when receiving the treatment through an online portal such as Zoom or Skype.
Yes, this treatment can work remarkably even when not in the same room with the person. To start, hypnotherapy is all about getting into a DEEP state of relaxation. Most people are going to feel the MOST relaxed in their own home.
In addition, these sessions typically have the person laying down or sitting comfortably with their eyes closed listening to their therapist speak. There may even be some calming music. All of this can happen just as easily over the Internet. In fact, if the patient wears headphones, they will be able to block out all ambient noise and focus JUST on their therapist, something that doesn’t necessarily happen in the therapist’s office where you may also hear distracting sounds from the building or outside traffic.
The great thing about receiving hypnotherapy via telehealth is you are not limited to working with a therapist in your local area. When looking for a hypnotherapist, it’s important that you find someone who is a member of the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis (ASCH) or the Society for Clinical and Experimental Hypnosis. Members of these organizations are required to prove they have a doctorate level degree in medicine, dentistry, or psychology, or a master’s degree in nursing, social work, psychology, or marital/family therapy plus a specific number of hours of approved training in hypnotherapy.
Of course, in addition to finding someone with the right credentials, you should also find someone you feel 100% comfortable with.
If you are interested in exploring hypnotherapy, please give my office a call. I would be happy to speak with you, answer any questions, and see if working together might make sense.
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It is estimated that over 16 million adults in the United States suffer from at least one major depressive episode each year. If you are in this group, you may have tried different treatments to help relieve your depression symptoms. The two most common treatments for depression are cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and prescription anti-depressants. But […]
It is estimated that over 16 million adults in the United States suffer from at least one major depressive episode each year. If you are in this group, you may have tried different treatments to help relieve your depression symptoms. The two most common treatments for depression are cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and prescription anti-depressants.
But new research is suggesting that Botox may also be an effective treatment for depression.
Botox is a substance used in cosmetic procedures to reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles. It is derived from a substance called botulinum toxin A that temporarily paralyzes muscles.
You may be wondering how this substance, used to help people look younger, helps with depression. The idea of using Botox to treat depression came in 2006 after a small trial with 10 participants suffering from depression. All were given a Botox injection in what’s called the “glabellar frown lines”. Those are the creases in between your eyes that develop from scowling or squinting.
Just two shorts months after the injection, 9 out of the 10 participants no longer had symptoms of depression. Though the 10th participant did still have some symptoms, they reported their mood had improved.
Over the course of the next decade, more studies would mimic this first one, each obtaining similar results. Depressed participants saw a marked improvement in symptoms and overall mood in as little as 6 weeks. This is congruent with antidepressants, which also typically take up to 6 weeks to begin working.
You may be thinking that appearing younger, or at least, having a couple of frown lines disappear, is what caused numerous study participants over the years to find their mood significantly improved after Botox injections. But subsequent studies disproved this particular theory.
The best explanation for why Botox helps treat depression is that it interrupts the “facial feedback” mechanism. Our facial expressions, that is whether we scowl, frown or smile, send feedback to our brain. It’s like a feedback loop. When we frown, we feel bad, and when we feel bad, we frown. By decreasing your facial muscle’s ability to frown, researchers believe this may be why people’s mood improves.
For those interested in trying Botox for depression, it’s best to look for a doctor who specializes in giving these injections. You can speak with your primary doctor for a referral. Also, as the FDA has not approved Botox to treat depression, your insurance most likely won’t cover it.
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If you’re like most people, you brought in the new year with a list of resolutions. And if you’re like most people, all of those resolutions have one goal: to better your life in some way. Whether that is through eating right, working out, learning a new language or decluttering your home office, resolutions are […]
If you’re like most people, you brought in the new year with a list of resolutions. And if you’re like most people, all of those resolutions have one goal: to better your life in some way. Whether that is through eating right, working out, learning a new language or decluttering your home office, resolutions are made to help us live our best lives.
In all of these instances (health, weight loss, decluttering) therapy can help.
You see, most people believe mental health therapy is something you seek when there is a major crisis; when we need help navigating depression or anxiety; when we’re going through a big transition, or when our marriage is on the verge of collapse.
And while therapy can absolutely help with all of these scenarios, it offers numerous benefits you may not have thought of:
Different therapy protocols have been shown to improve different physical symptoms associated with stress. This includes a reduction in migraines, digestive upset, better appetite and improved sleep.
Many of us think we are running our lives when really, our lives are being run by subconscious programming from early childhood. Therapy helps clients understand where feelings, beliefs and behaviors really come from. Through treatment, individuals can become more self-aware and empowered to take responsibility for the lives they are creating. In this way, THEY create their lives instead of their lives being something that is happening TO them.
Of course, self-awareness also means becoming aware of your passions and desires. Many people spend a majority of their life doing what others want instead of what THEY want. And many people simply don’t KNOW what they want in life.
Therapy can help you become an archeologist of sorts, digging into your heart, mind and soul to uncover what it is you value, love, desire, need and want.
It’s the new year and we all have new goals that we are hoping to reach. Well, therapy can help you reach those goals!
A trained therapist can help you set achievable goals as well as help you outline the micro steps you’ll need to take to get there. They can also then act as coach and cheerleader, supporting your efforts to reach your goals.
Yes, therapy is something that you can turn to for depression, addiction, and help with your crumbling relationships. But therapy can help with so much more. If you’d like to explore treatment options in the new year, please get in touch with me.
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Not many of us will get through life without facing our own share of challenges. But some people experience not just stress and strife, but actual trauma. Trauma may come in the form of a physically or emotionally abusive relationship, a physical accident such as a car accident, rape, the sudden loss of a loved […]
Not many of us will get through life without facing our own share of challenges. But some people experience not just stress and strife, but actual trauma. Trauma may come in the form of a physically or emotionally abusive relationship, a physical accident such as a car accident, rape, the sudden loss of a loved one, or war.
When a person experiences trauma, their entire world changes almost instantly. Many trauma survivors have a hard time feeling safe and secure. They begin to feel anxiety and depression, have trouble sleeping, and may experience other behavioral changes that are frightening to them and their loved ones.
When you have experienced trauma and begin to see some of the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), it’s time to explore treatment so you can begin healing. The idea of therapy can feel scary and overwhelming to people with PTSD, mainly because they need to have a sense of total control to feel safe.
But trauma therapy is really something that can empower an individual with PTSD. With the help of a caring and qualified mental health professional, the person can begin to process past events, stripping that traumatic event of its power.
Trauma therapy is a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and has the potential to actually change the way your brain works through what is called neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity simply means our brains and neural pathways (how we think and feel) are malleable. Through specific mental health tools and strategies, we can retrain our brains to let go of the fear and begin to heal.
Some of the goals of trauma therapy are:
If you or a loved one are living with PTSD, it’s important that you recognize the symptoms and seek help. Life does not have to continue to be scary or overwhelming. There are strategies that can help you process your pain so that you may continue to live your life full of joy and peace.
If you would like to explore treatment options, please get in touch with me. I would be very happy to help you leave the past in the past and move on to brighter tomorrows.
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Depression and low self-esteem are two sides of the same coin. While low self-esteem leaves people vulnerable to depression, depression can absolutely destroy self-esteem. But, though low self-esteem may be deeply rooted, there are things you can do to improve it, even if you are suffering from depression. 1. Start Your Day with Positivity It’s […]
Depression and low self-esteem are two sides of the same coin. While low self-esteem leaves people vulnerable to depression, depression can absolutely destroy self-esteem.
But, though low self-esteem may be deeply rooted, there are things you can do to improve it, even if you are suffering from depression.
1. Start Your Day with Positivity
It’s important you start each day positively. Doing so will help your mind to habitually recognize good, especially the good in yourself. So, surround yourself with positivity in the form of music, books, calendars, computer wallpaper, etc. You can even sign up to a service that will send you funny memes or cute animal videos each day. Feeling good at the beginning of the day will set a tone and help you be positive throughout.
2. Analyze and Correct Negative Thinking
Negative thinking is the catalyst for both low self-esteem and depression. The more one thinks negatively, the less able they are to see themselves and the world around them in an accurate light. Soon, the negative thoughts are on a loop like an old record that keeps skipping, causing the same lyric to play over and over again.
The first thing that is needed is the ability to analyze your own thoughts. When a self-critical thought occurs, ask yourself three questions:
Once you realize there is no evidence to support your thought, that your friends and family would disagree with your thought, and that your thought makes you feel bad about yourself, it’s time to replace that thought. Not with a vague affirmation, but with factual and meaningful self-statements.
For example, perhaps you have taken on a project at work, and currently you find yourself feeling overwhelmed. Your thoughts may currently sound like, “Why did I say I could handle this? I never finish things on time.” You will now replace that thought with a positive factual thought, something simple like, “I’m doing better at this job everyday and am continuing to make progress.”
A healthy self-esteem is not about being perfect or thinking you’re perfect when you’re not. No one is. A healthy self-esteem is about acknowledging your strengths and accepting your weaknesses and realizing you’re like everyone else – human and beautifully flawed.
3. Treat Yourself Well
Though you may feel you don’t deserve it, by treating yourself, you will send positive messages to your subconscious mind that you ARE worth it. Consider taking yourself out to a nice lunch, buy yourself that sweater you’ve been eyeing, or go get a relaxing massage. You don’t even have to spend money; show yourself you’re worth it by spending time reading a book, going for a walk in nature, or doing anything that inspires you.
4. Seek Positive Support
You want to surround yourself with people who celebrate your strengths, not your weaknesses. This can include seeking the positive support of a therapist who can work with you on analyzing and replacing negative thought patterns. When we don’t have an accurate self-perception, it can help to get a new perspective from an objective third party.
Increasing your self-esteem isn’t easy, but if you practice these tips, you will be able to chip away at the negative self-talk every day.
Need help with your self-esteem? If you or a loved one is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
If you’re like most people, you deal with your fair share of stress. And often, this stress leads to an inability to get the quality of sleep necessary for optimal health and well-being. Often, people turn to harmful substances to deal with stress. Whether it’s drinking too much or eating processed “comfort” foods, these unhealthy […]
If you’re like most people, you deal with your fair share of stress. And often, this stress leads to an inability to get the quality of sleep necessary for optimal health and well-being.
Often, people turn to harmful substances to deal with stress. Whether it’s drinking too much or eating processed “comfort” foods, these unhealthy stress beaters tend to make matters far worse.
It’s a much better idea to use a natural substance with a long history of helping balance the body and mind.
Enter: adaptogens.
You most likely use certain plants and herbs in your life already for their benefits. Green tea for antioxidants, ginseng for memory, and ginger for its natural pain relief.
Well, adaptogens are herbs that can help you deal with the effects of stress. But they do so in a very unique and powerful way. These first work to reduce your body’s stress response and then they support your overall health by helping your body achieve balance and harmony, otherwise known as homeostasis.
The long and short of it is, adaptogens can make you feel less anxious, stressed, and depressed. They have even been known to completely turn a situation around and make the person feel energetic, motivated, and optimistic.
Some of the most widely used adaptogens are:
When our bodies react to stress, we are thrown into a “fight or flight” response. Certain hormones like cortisol and adrenaline are produced and pumped out into the bloodstream to help our bodies deal with the danger in our environment. Our heart rates and breathing increase and our blood flow is directed away from our brain and digestion and toward our arms and legs.
This is great for fighting an attacker or running like heck from a hungry bear, but it’s not great for our overall health. Over time, cortisol can help us pack on the weight, especially around our middle. And adrenaline can make it hard for us to relax enough at night to get a good night’s sleep.
So when adaptogens help our body deal with stress, they also help our body deal with the negative effects of the stress response. This means improved sleep, the potential to lose weight around your middle, and better overall health.
As with any supplement, it’s best to speak with your doctor before adding something new to your regimen. This is especially true if you are currently taking medications. Having said this, many doctors do not support the use of non-prescriptive supplements to treat mental health conditions and other diseases.
You may want to find a nutritionist who can help you determine which adaptogen is right for you and what dosage to try.
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If I asked whether you were the victim of childhood emotional neglect (CEN), would you know how to answer? Probably not. CEN is often misunderstood and therefor, misdiagnosed. Childhood emotional neglect means an individual was not provided the emotional support from parents and other adults that is required to grow up to be a confident […]
If I asked whether you were the victim of childhood emotional neglect (CEN), would you know how to answer? Probably not. CEN is often misunderstood and therefor, misdiagnosed.
Childhood emotional neglect means an individual was not provided the emotional support from parents and other adults that is required to grow up to be a confident person with a healthy self-esteem. Though a parent may never physically harm the child and provide them with food, healthcare, clothing and shelter, they may still emotionally neglect their child causing psychological harm.
Symptoms of CEN
In her book “Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect”, Dr. Jonice Webb outlined some of the most commonsymptoms of CEN:
That last symptom is a biggie. Have you found that for most of your life, your needs always came second (if not third or fourth?). If yes, it’s time to recognize that your feelings and needs matter.
With this in mind, here are some ways you can begin to treat yourself better:
Take Baby Steps
You’ve spent years believing your needs didn’t matter, don’t expect that putting yourself first will come easy to you. It won’t. It will feel awkward and downright wrong to put yourself first. The important thing is that you take baby steps each day to show yourself you matter.
Ask Yourself What You Need
If you’ve experienced CEN, you’re most likely unaware you even haveneeds, so you probably won’t be able to identify them right away. Take some time to get to know yourself. Ask yourself what you need and be sure to listen!
Stay Healthy
You have a big and exciting journey ahead of you, one in which you will be exploring your inner world and getting to finally know yourself. This is going to require strength and energy. Be sure to avoid processed foods and opt instead for whole foods focusing on fruits and veggies.
Also, be sure to get plenty of exercise and enough rest. Adults generally require seven to nine hours of sleep each night, so don’t cheat your body. And avoid using the TV, computer, or your smartphone before bed.
Learn to Say No
Guess what? If you want to put yourself first more often, you’re going to sometimes have to say “no” to other people. Don’t feel guilty about doing this. Having boundaries is healthy. It’s not only your right to say no to others sometimes, it’s your personal responsibility.
Get Support
As wonderful as your self-discovery journey will be, it will be fraught with bumps in the road. It’s important that you have someone who will support your efforts without judgements or criticism.
Consider seeking guidance from a professional therapist who can help you navigate your complex emotions and offer tools to manage stress in the future. A therapist will help you prioritize your needs moving forward and recognize your emotions and needs matter.
If you’d like to explore treatment options, please be in touch with me. I’d love to discuss how I may be able to help you on your journey.